2015…What a Year of Learning, Growing, and Resilience!

Written by: Lorraine Twombly

Published: January 2016

This month seems like a good month to write about the last year, 2015.  There surely have been some changes and some of them were definitely for the better.  Some, I’m not sure why they happened the way they did, and I’m still scratching my head.  Patience and resilience are definitely the two best words to describe the past year.

2015 started when my mom fell and broke her left leg in 3 places, which changed her life and mine in some ways. This was only two weeks after we visited her over the Christmas holidays. Being the eldest daughter placed me in yet another role of care-giver and sibling team coordinator, financial preparation, and researcher of assisted living services. This was not an easy venture, as our business has been growing in leaps and bounds and thank goodness we hired someone to help facilitate as the work increases.  Lesson learned here – let go of the unplanned adversity that can pop up at any moment and change your way of life for at least 3 months.  My mom’s problem resolved when we found a wonderful rehab center that also catered to assisted living or worse and independent living surroundings, which has its own community and beautifully landscaped grounds.  I could breathe knowing that my mom is now under supervision and living among her own little community. I am grateful to my siblings (this includes my sisters-in law) for their support and grounded optimism.

It felt great to come home to our wonderful State of Maine and get back to work, spending much needed time with my family and friends.  Without them, it would have been hard to be away as long a period of time. Facebook and Skype were my best friends but not the same as being home! 

Once home for about a month, we found ourselves in a position of possibly moving to another location to conduct business.  We actually looked at a great place on the South Portland/Westbrook line, where there were tons of businesses and the location was only about 2 miles from where we are at Sable Oaks.  After much searching, things worked out for us to stay at 707 Sable Oaks and we’ve never been happier to be in a great building where our clients have been visiting us for 18 months…we now have a stake in the ground and signed a 10-year lease.  The lesson I learned was to be patience with the “system” and some of the property owners out there. They have their own process that is both interesting and frustrating, but a lot was learned and that’s all that counts.

In late September and early October, a bunch of good friends from the Hannaford years all got together to spend time in Orlando.  One of our friends had turned 65 and we all promised her that we’d do a trip like this and catch up with our lives.  Well, we did it!!  I left a day early to visit a good friend in North Carolina and the trip ended beautifully.  I got to have fun with some friends I’ve known for 40-plus years (all sharing a 6-bed condo in a beautiful resort near Disney) AND visit a very good friend who used to live in our beautiful state and moved to another beautiful state and near Asheville…if not for being far away from the ocean, Asheville rocks and would be a great place to retire!!  One lesson I learned, after spending 10 days away, was to forgive myself for taking 10 days to have fun with my girlfriends, when earlier in the year I had to be away to help my mom.  The other lesson I learned - straight talk is definitely the way to go and works great if you use tact, stick to the facts, and be genuinely concerned as a friend.  Not that anything major happened, only that we all have great opportunities to talk over something if it bothers us.

We did another trip in early December to Florida for a 5-day family reunion and a “car” trip home to Maine with Ralph. We have sworn never to do that trip again…27 hours of being in lots of traffic. To make things a bit worse, the day before we got home, I fractured my ankle in two places, along with a bad sprain.  So, right then and there my life changed dramatically…I lost my independence!!  While going to quick care and finding out about my dilemma, I decided to be as mindful about what was going on as possible.  In other words, telling myself that accidents happen, that I should be taking this in stride in a possible light and that was my mantra ever since!  The fractures and sprain are healing nicely and I should be on my feet soon. Three words describe my lessons on this one:  Let go, read and catch up on things you can do, spend lots more time with your spouse and this has been great as we are always so busy working and accommodating others. Over Christmas, I got to see our grandchildren (we’d been traveling to Florida for 6 years straight due to dad/mom situations) and that was truly the best gift I could have gotten this year!!

To recap:

• Let go of the unplanned adversity that can pop up at any moment and, once you’ve had a chance to breathe about the situation, things can be done, support can be there when you ask, and things start to look like it was meant to be.
• Being grateful goes a very long way when you show it, especially when your support system has been there for you. I am forever grateful to my husband, family and friends for all their thoughts, well wishes, and for taking the time to “be there” when I needed them.  There’s nothing better!
• Patience is definitely a virtue and I can sorely lack in this category, depending on the situation. I have to say that the more I learned about properties, property owners, the waiting and wondering, I am very happy to be in the business of leadership, relationship building, and helping others to learn and grow.  Leasing commercial real estate is not my cup of tea!!
• Forgive yourself when you make a decision that is part of your balance in life…it is okay to energize your life with safe and harmless events that can help you be closer to your loved ones…I surely missed everyone when I was off with my friends and was happy and energized after all that fun, talk, and companionship when I came back home.
• Sometimes accidents force us to do the things we’ve been wanting to do, like read, write, catch up on phone calls, and to do some of the less priority work that needs to be done. I feel very good about all the books I’m reading and I’ve got many more to catch up on…Netflix has helped too, along with exercising what I can and doing my puzzles!
• Letting go and accepting support when you are down is humbling. Instead of being sad or frustrated, I’m very appreciative and taking everything in stride.

Thank you for reading my lessons learned in 2015.  Happy 2016 and hope your lessons learned are worthwhile and enriching!

Lorraine Twombly